Category: Dating and Relationships
Wondering y our opinions on this, hsould blind people only date other blind people or only sighted people?
well, i'm going to say that it depends on who you fall in love with. but that's just me. but i don't think one should limit which group they date in. it's not really fair. but again, that's my opinion.
Absolutely not! Love is the only thing in a relationship that matters not who has sight and who doesn't. Besides, a person's outside shouldn't matter, it's what's on the inside that counts.
Troy
I like blind girls, since all girls cheat on you anyway, blind girls can't see the tire iron headed toard there head after you catch them cheating, those damn sighties can avoid it.
Well, speak for yourself BlindGuy <grin> better luck with the girls man, may be you're doing something wrong, that's all I have to say .. by the sound of it you'd pretty much date any girl that wants to date you. ;)
But seriously, lots of factors to consider, from a practical (and purely practical) pint of view there are a lot of things that would be easier if you're datint a sighted girl, drivers license, running small errands, travelling, going new places (sort of the same thing actually), matching colors and choosing your clothes. Bottomline though, all of that don't matter, the only thing that matters is who makes you happy and who you want to spend your life with. If you don't love a girl it really doesn't matter if she's the hottest girl in the world with 6 billion dollars, you can show her off (provided everyone else will be wanting to cheat on you with her) and enjoy some of her money, but it wouldn't make you happy, superficially may be, but deep down it wouldn't (but you culd buy a lot of ironing boards though). So, it sounds cheesy and romantic and everything but it all comes down to who you love and, quoting the Smashing Pumpkins
"but you just can't tell, who you'll love and who you won't", it'll always be like that.
cheers
-B
Agreed with Acosha. . .
Oh come on who in their right mind would date that eejit.
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I'd go out with either my partner is sighted and she has heard all the ignorant remarks E.G "Why are you with him he's no right" not to mention the dreaded H word and i refuse to demean myself by typing it.
In my teenage years I would only go out with blind/vi girls because i felt safer and accepted they didn't worry about having to help me or and we would havea good laugh at the hassles involved.Later i developed an interest in the same sex and experimenting was bloody dangerous! If i mistook any sign of interest as a come on the result could well have been fatal.So stuck to Vi bi fella's who knew the score and could educate me on the art of seduction and they must have been good teachers..Well that's another story.
As long as she washes her ass on a regular basis, I don't give a shit if she is blind or sighted.
Wildebrew i agree totally so many pile on unreasonable or more often unattainable expectations on a potential partner,and the minute a man/woman finds someone the inevitable happens they start to change the person, or something unforseen happens and they leave at the 1st sign of trouble,I wish we had some kind of built in warning system to alert us to these shallow short term if everythings wonderful "lovers"..
I agree with others when they say that it doesn't matter what they are blind or sighted, as long as you love them. I am dating someone who is blind, and I a mjust as happy as I would be if I was dating someone who was sighted. I did try out dating sighted people, and I just felt that they didn't understand where I was coming from, and other factors lead it to not working out. I didn't love those people though, and do love Radio Man, so dating a blind person is fine with me
I couldn't agree with what acosha and others have said here, it doesn't matter at all to me if she's sighted or not, because beauty is in the eye of the beholder, let the mind's eye be your judge.
agreed with Wildebrew and Acosha,
I have to say it doesn't matter either way. I've dated both sighted and blind and had hell, and I've dated both and had good relationships. Just depends on the person, not their visual level. And, not all girls cheat!!! I certainly don't!
Sorry for the typo in my last post, I ment to say I couldn't agree more with what acosha and others have stated here, it doesn't matter ither way as far as I'm concerned.
Although I agree that things like if somebody is blind or sighted doesn't matter like a lot of these things don't matter, isn't this the exception to the rule? Perhaps y'all might want to educate the rest of the planet and wise them up, eh? Hahahahahaha! Yeah, when I was young, I wanted a girlfriend, but didn't know what I wanted and knew little to nothing about dating, I wanted a sighted girlfriend because I must have thought it was easier. Besides, there were lots more of them than blind or disabled girls, and I felt that I was expected to hang with the blind and disabled exclusively and leave sighted people alone. I wasn't having any of that. That was not a good move, as I was not all that successful trying to date sighted girls. So after finally realizing I was limitting myself, I got more open-minded in my thirties and had better luck. In the end, it depends on what you want from a relationship. Some of us are just more comfy around other blind people and that's OK. Others prefer sighted people and tend not to make them shy away and that's cool.
I have to say if a sited person asked me out i would go with them but also in the same area if a blind person asked me out i would go with them so, if someone asked me out sited or not no matter what if i loved them i would do it
i agree with Witchcraft
It may or may not belong here but this sort of reminds me of what my female friend once said to me.
She's sighted (and we've never been romantically involved or anything but we did talk about blind and sighted people dating in general) and she said she would want to try and date a blind guy because she would feel more at ease with a blind person in that she wouldn't have to look 100% perfect all the time and she wouldn't be so self-conscious, especially with physical stuff and she would probably enjoy it more. I was a bit offended in a way and told her if I was dating a sighted girl I would really expect her to look the best when we were out together, I mean, it wouldn't matter that much but I would feel weird if I knew a friend or a girl friend or whatever didn't bother looking good just because I couldn't see her .. it was a strange topic. Have you guys any thoughts ?
i feel the same way. i was once watching thi show and this guy said he wanted to date a blind girl because then he could let the house get dirtier and dirtier and she would never know and he could go days and days without taking a shower. i think it's stupid that people think things about us without taking the time to find out if it's true. i saw this tv commercial about this woman and she was talking about "when my best friend went blind, we were both devestated" devestated? Not the right word exactly. just learn how to do things differently. get over it. move on. *smiles*
Little do these folks know that blind people, most of them at least, actually could tell if their partner or house got increasingly dirty, so they're not off the hook and if the blind person is smart, they'd leave such an irresponsible person. Hahahaha!
true, labrynth.
I personally am married to a sighted man, and he would tell you if he came on here... I do not like things getting dirty; that includes people or houses. Yes, our house is cluttered, but not dirty. LOL. He'd never get away with it. I'm to aware, and most blind people are. However, I don't see this thing about always looking my best. I guess I'm wierd. I don't where makeup, however, I'm clean, wear clean clothes, and keep myself neat. I just don't see any need to put unnatural things on my face just so men will appreciate me more. I'm loved just the way I am, and if someone can't do that, then they're not worth it.
Witchcraft, true, by "looking their best" I definitely did not insinuate women have to wear make-up or anything, but neat clothes, hair should be good and if they feel makeup is a pat of their outfit they should wear it. I think most blind people are neat freaks, if things are not in order or clean
a. Everyone that comes visit is going to blame it on you being blind and not being able to take care of yourself, this is extremely irritating and so I, at least, make a point of making my place look good and prove I can keep it as clean as any sighted person can and
b. you won't be able to find anything if things are all over the place and
c. you want to avoid bugs and other stuff like that, if you have dirty things, like open soda cans or something bugs could get attracted to them and you won't see that happening so your house might be bug infsted without you knowing it if you're very careless. Fortunately this only hapened once to me in college on the ground floor but it felt awful.
Cheers
-B
To me personally, it doesn't matter at all if girl is blind or sited. If I love her enough, her personalitty, if I am attracted to her, that's all that matters to me. As WB said, there are practicalitties in having a sited gilfriend, but I don't want a girlfriend to drive me, shop, cook for me, clean for me ETC. I want a girlfriend because I enjoy her company, enjoy the fact that she cares about me, respect me and all the other things I I'd want from a girl. My parents had that idea in their head that I should date only sited girls because of the advantages which I just mentioned. They were very unhappy with me during my relationships with blind girls, but luckily they got that idea out of their heads and realised that girl can have 100 % site, but if I'm not happy with her there's no point. I've dated both blind and sited and I loved them all in their own ways. Each has it's advantage, I already mentioned advantage of dating a sited girl, while blind girls can be more understanding or rather be more familiar as we'd have same or similar problems or obsticles and barieres in life. But, as I said, to me it's the person that counts that's most important fact and if she is blind or sited, does not bother me at all.
I'm sighted and would date a blind or sighted person. It doesn't matter to me. People are more than what their eyes see or don't see.
As for me, a mix.. Or just a date. Is good! Who cares if they can or can't see? Makes things more interesting.
Post 24, I expect a girl to do all those thingns for me, we need to go back to the 1950's when women new there place.
I'll date blind or sighted, just as long as she has hardwood floors.
Well, I'm married to a sighted chick and to be quite honest with you, she's a raging cunt! She takes advantage of the fact that I can't see by reading only the mail that she wants to read to me, and does other things. Yes, it's convenient to have the drivers license and what not, but let's think long term here, blind people don't have to pay car insurance, or repair bills, or gas prices, and a shitload of other transportation expenses, I really don't care about whether or not they're blind or sighted, but I see the advantages and disadvantages to both.
I agree with Bug. I am sighted but I would date a blind person if they were who I fell in love with. It don't matter to me one bit.
There is this saying that I love very much: Love can't be seen or even touched it must be felt with the heart.
and it speaks volumes. At least it does to me :). But I'm rambling now so I'll go but yeah I'd date someone who's blind.
As far as my thoughts go on dating, Once I am in a relationship I am in it forever. I've never cheated and I never will. I've been cheated on already and it hurts so I would never put another human being thru that. I said I would date a blind person in my last post so I won't go into that any further :) But yeah I wanted to just say that I would never cheat.
I agree with the majority here. no expectations; whoever I am attracted to at the time. I would say there'd be advantages and disadvantages to both, not that I can speak from personal experience, just perceptions really.
Something that a few raised earlier, sure blind couples will always have that deep understanding of little things that each other may feel nervous, self-conscious, whatever about and have that special bond because of it but I know of sighted partners that can be just as understanding, even accepting as certain cases do arise.
Forward not backward?... Early 2000's, not 1900's? However, I do have to agree, my husband is sighted, and very understanding!!! He's been great through a lot of things; though there are some habits he has that I think comes from being sighted. No worries, I'll teach him; some century... Also, the one who's been cheated on; I totally understand. My first fiance did that to me, and I caught them in the act. He was sighted to, but that was no reason to think all would.
This my messages for the board. But I think it doesn't matter if your sight or not sighted what you really feel in the heart thats what counts. Plus I was set up on a blind date myself by my bestfriend Michelle and her ex boyfriend Steve and My boyfriend Jeff and I have been going out for six years now. I'm a sighted person that went on a blind date. Ain't that cute. Awww ! But I agree with a whole people that say that it don't matter what you are who you are blind or sighted its the heart inside that really matters ! That's how I truly feel. Sweet Sue.
I'd go out with any girl sighted or not that I really liked a lot but unfortunately, that hasn't happened in a while. Feelings are interesting things, if I have feelings for some one, might as well let her know because where I'm from it seems like everyone's looking out for themselves anyway so it probably wouldnt' last but Some day it might.
The question of whether to date blind or sighted people is, it seems, always being debated. For me, personally, it really doesn't matter either way. Each has its advantages and disadvantages, as with everything in life. If you were to date a sighted person, they'd most likely have a car, so you could undoubtedly get around easier, but then when it came to issues surrounding your visual impairment, you'd most likely have to explain a lot of your problems and frustrations to them, which could be done, but it wouldn't be necessarily clear how much they would understand.
Personally, I'm in a relationship now with someone who is blind, and I couldn't be happier. It's just nice sometimes to not have to explain yourself to someone, because they understand many of the issues surrounding your visual impairment. I also think that the relationship depends a great deal on compatibility. It wouldn't matter if the person I'm dating lived as close as to be virtually in my backyard, or if he lived in Ant Arctica or some really deserted place like that, if the two of us aren't compatible, and no connection is felt between us, I really don't see any point in trying to pursue anything if it's apparent that it isn't working.
Just my thoughts, for whatever they're worth.
I really don't care my girlfriend is blind and I love her verry much, but I've dated girls with sight what really matters is how much you love the person and if God wants you to be with this person or not. So whether your with a blind person or a sighted person it really just matters about how God's plan works for you.
I don't think it matters if your date is sited or blind It matters if they love you and that you love them. If you are going to date some one you need to be able to help them if they are in need of help.
well, i agree, generally, but it's been about six years since i've been attracted to a blind guy. I always found sighted guys attractive, for whatever reason.
Having lived my entire life with sighted people, gone through mainstream education, and am now at college, i've never had much exposure to blind people. I always dated sighted girls because that's all i knew. last summer though, i dated a girl who was totally blind, like myself. it lasted 4 weeks and i can safely say i've never been happier. it ended messily with her going back to an x of hers on our month anniversary. I don't think it was because she was blind that i was so happy, but because we had so much in common. In conclusion, i would say it's not the person's disability but what you have in common and how much you love them. I just hope i'm that happy again soon, it's a nice way to be!
Yeah, as most of you have said, it doesn't matter what is behind the eyes! lol! Although as a newly blind individual, I thaught it would be so hard to date a blind man.. I had a sighted bf for nine years, and am now with a blind man.. I really thaught it would be a lot harder than it is! Actually it is a bit more easier, i mean we both know what the other one is going through. Yeah, reading mail, reading a label, going places, and all that stuff can be annoying, but we are so much in love, it doesn't matter! There are a lot more good things than those few annoying mishaps! We are always teasing each other, like if one of us leaves something in the way, we say don't you kow a blind person lives here! lol! Df is awesome! lol!
I don't think it matters what so ever if u date a sighty or blindo person. U know, I've gone out w/sighted guy and blind guy. Even though I am only 17, I still say who cares if there blind or sighted? I think that for a sighted guy, it might b a little strange for you to expect him to fully understand you when it is about your visual impairment but, realistically, if u r dating a partial/blind person if u can't quite understand each other where u r coming from, would that be any different if u were with a sighted person? Besides, as far as the understanding goes about being visually impaired, isn't that what your visually impaired friends are for?
personally, i didn't really get the chance to go up with blind guy yet so i don't know the feeling and what will happen. yes i have try before on date with a sighted person, and i don't know what will b the different between sighted and blind. the most important for me is care for each other and love them with all your heart. sighted? hmm if he really care and love me, my blindness won't b a big problem for him.
As far as whether or not to date a sighted or blind person, it doesn't matter to me. The thing that matters to me is , as long as I am happy and the guy treats me with respect, shows that he care/ loves me and is there for me either physically on on the phone when I'm in a situation that i need help or just need someome to talk to. I'm in a relationship with my best friend who I've been best friends for with 11 years. This person is also like a big brother to me, so he is my best friend, big brother and boyfriend and I couldn't be happier. I've known this person sense I was 10 and have had feeings for him sense I was 16, well they started when I was 12, but they got stronger by the age of 16 and now they are even stronger.
i agree with the majority of you all. the only thing that matters, is your love for the person, and their love for you.
Now that's odd, it says 46 posts on the topic list but there are only 45 according to the last post number. Hmmm... wonder if this will change things.
James
well, being young and all, only 16, i will honestly say now that i dont no much about love. But i am blind, and i do agree that if blind people do go out with other blind people, it does give you both that same thing in common straightaway. But in all honesty, its the love that counts. That common streak that you share being blind might just not be enough to hold you through. But i dont see anything wrong in doing it though, but sighted people can be just as good.
Hello I am a sighted girl and I date sighted and blind guys but not in a blind date, its either I meet them at school or I meet them through my friends. It does not matter blind or sighted. It just depends on how you handle the date.
I will, never, ever, not in a million, billion years date a "BLIND!" guy. I will however consider blind guys. Note the spelling and case differences. No men need apply if they, live with their mommy's after the age of twenty-five, rock/flap/eye-rub/spin/etc, I hate those blindisms, can't do basic life tasks like laundry, cooking, shopping and school or job related tasks, spend more than seven hours per week involved with a blind organization for recreational perposes or that have no friends outside of the "BLIND!" community. However ordinary guys who just happen to be blind are fine with me.
I will never date girls who have so much free time on there hands, and such a pothetic life that they routinely need to bring up dating topics that have been dead for months.
Lol, Jarred. Personally, all the blind guys I've dated were perverted ass holes that were full of themselves and were sex craved man hoes. Otherwise, I would consider both. My one blindism, rocking. My dad hates it, but my bf, who is sighted, loves it and thinks it's so fucking adorable. I only do it when I'm happy and he does too, and he's a sighty. One of the only ones I've ever dated.
ok people, i just wanted to put my little quote. in here i've dated mostly sighted guys.but i've relized that i don't care.if they are blind or sighted i just want to be happy with someone and live life as best as anyone can. it's taken me a while to relize that but i find it to be true. And i be leave happyness can concor overall. smile
So don't just go for anyone. but don't be to picky either. well later everyone smile and wave
Lmao, Jared. I love you.
It doesn't matter to me in the slightest. There are advantages and disadvantages to both, but it's all about the particular person in question. Of course I have preferences as to what I do and don't like, but blindness versus sight isn't especially important to me.
never dated a blind guy, have a sighted BF, and we're doing very well
If I'd decided to wait for a blind guy, I'd be a very lonely man. I had a vi bf in high schoo, but, that was at a school for same; kinda skews the odds, no? LOL.
I've dated blind and sighted people, and for some reason i find my sighted BF far more attractive. generally my relationships with sighties have been the more stable.
That's because 99.99% of blind people are really fucking special.
True, Jared, and I like that, Danielle.
I think I would choose a blind/visually impaired person over a fully sigted partner because even though I would get the luxeries of having someone to drive me around I wouldn't want it simply because I'm use to the lifestyle of traveling on my own without those types of conveniences.
A couple of things here.
First of all, I believe you should be with whomever you're attracted to; whether it's a sighted or blind person.
Finally, to post 4, I'm sorry to tell you, but blind people are just as capable of cheating on you as their sighted counterparts. So you need to get rid of that false concept.
Debbie
Hi Wildebrew,
I can understand your feeling offended by what your friend said; I, too would have been offended.
I mean, like you, I still would want my guy to look his best.
Don't be in a relationship with me so that you can be lazy and look sloppy anytime you want to, geesh.
Debbie
well i fell in love with some one that can see!!!! i think who ever makes you happy that who you should be with
Jesus Christe just let old topics die for the love of god.
It depends who the individual person likes. If they like someone who can see or can't, who cares?
I think it depends on who you love. I certainly don't go out of my way to date blind guys, but if I really did fall in love with one, I cmight see myself with him. Of course, if my man went blind, that would be a different story and I would stick with him, unless we broke up for another reason.
I think one should date whoever they fall in love with, and that falling in love shouldn't be based on being blind or sighted. If that's what it's based on, then I don't see it lasting. I've always dated blind guys, but that's been because I've really never fallen for a sighted one, or he for me.
I'll add my two cents or half a cent in here. Blind and sighted people can both cheat on you. So just because a girl or guy is blind doesn't mean he/she won't cheat. I'm very happy with my relationship and my girlfriend is sighted. We've been together almost five years and things are great. A few years ago some blind people would want to stone me for dating "outside of the community." But I'm glad not everyone has that attitude.
I just can't let this topic die, LOL. To me, whether the guy is blind or sighted doesn't matter. It's all about whether the attraction is there.
It all depends on who you love. I've dated wonderful blind men and wonderful sighted men.
I don't see a problem with either as long as you both share values. I much prefer sighted folks though, since you do get more intellectuality with them.
I haven't dated sighted girl so far. but while thinking of it, I personally feel nothing wrong with it. provided, if he or she isn't taking your blindness serious.
and again I wanted to say, "love is Blind".
Raaj.
FPR, why do you say that you get more "intellectuality" with the sighted? I know plenty of very intelligent sighted people, but I also know plenty of very intelligent blind people. (just as I know plenty of idiots blind and sighted alike.) People who are blind are just more people, with all the range of the spectrum as any other group of people.
it doesn't me either the person is sighted or blind. what its important is his personality...
both blind and sighted have their advantages and disadvantages. according to my experience, i think i'd prefer to date a blind person than a sighted. this because, sighted person sometime can be a bit over controlling on their caring towards the blind person. for them is perhaps something "should do". but for me, is rather, bad, it somehow lower down my self-confident and independent level.
You know, I asked FPR a question but realized I hadn't actually directly answered the main question.
Personally i'm perfectly willing to date a sighted or blind person. The vision aspect means not that much to me. In practice I've only actually dated blind people, but it's not been a deliberate choice. It's just how things have happened. I think, as some have said above, it's sometimes easier to connect with a blind person because you don't have to explain as much, and they're more likely to accept you as just another person rather than a curiosity. For the record I've had several sighted friends, and some of them very close friends. I'm by no means saying that there aren't some sighted people that will just accept you as a person and go with it. Because there are. Unfortunately I think that currently sighted people like that are in the minority. It's getting better, and every person you meet who you can help them see that we're just another person, no more, no less, will help that.
Ok, I think that covers my views on that. :)
Although my husband of almost 25 years is blind, I've dated both. To me, Life vision, and imaginative foresight are much more important than physically being able to see. All couples have issues. Ours are just different then other people's.
another issue i have observed with blind and sighted couples is power and control. Hey defining and maintaining a balance in those areas is vital for any successful relationship to thrive and grow., there are differing issues with those who can see and those who can't. For example, a friend of mine recently married a whoman who can see. He is enjoying the heaven of having free onboard transportation. Only there is one caveat. He has to go where the driver of the car wants to venture. His lovely bride considers my neighborhood to be in a war zone. Therefore no visits from them are forthcoming. I don't know if I'd be willing to give up that much control to another person. Annoying stuff would really get on my nerves as well. Sighted people have this problem called moving stuff and not telling me where it went. Grrrrrrrr!!!! My kitchen is my haven. My daughter in law and son were with us for a few days. I'm still searching for the things she put down who knows where. She wasn't being spiteful, but they just don't think as we do!!!!
I don't necessarily think blind people are any less intellectual, but some of us don't have the social skills that sighted people have. But, there are exceptions to everything of course, and I know plenty of sighted people whose social skills suck, as well as blind people I can say the same about, and just the opposite too. I personally prefer to date blind people, because it's a little easier. You don't have to try as hard to make a good impression, because sadly, with a lot of sighted people, not only do you have to do all the right things you would normally do to start a relationship, you also have to prove you're competent, and not some poor helpless blind person. You would have to knock down a huge stereotype in order to get most sighted people to take you seriously. But honestly, it doesn't matter to me, if there was a sighted person who was willing to look past that, and treat me as an equal who I wanted to date, I would.
I have, through other people's doing and the insanity of camp, been the crush of many a blind boy. Unfortunately, each one of these blind boys had some huge social failings. One, for example, insisted I was his soul mate from his past lives. Another didn't shower daily until I forced him to.
Needless to say, I stay on the sighted end of the spectrum. Boys who can drive me around town are so very useful.